Favorite Eli Stone Quotes
Maggie: Okay, so, we know he owns a surf shack, right. Ah so maybe we can narrow down the candidates by posing as surf journalists, then...
Eli: Town's about a block long Veronica Mars.
Maggie: If you're so smart you find it.
Eli: I looked for a "Thanks for convincing your father to represent me at my disbarment hearing" card, but I couldn't find one.
Taylor: Did you look next to the "Sorry I called off our wedding because of the guy from Wham" display?
Patti: Can I be honest with you?
Taylor: This is you holding back?
Eli: Two months ago, I cared about winning my cases. But now I care about helping my clients.
Ms. Raines: And how much help can you be to them if you die in the middle of their case?
Eli: Well probably not that much...
Holly: You really have a way with women.
Eli: I'm not sure how it happened, but I think my having an aneurysm pisses her off.
Eli: You make it sound like I don't have much of a shot.
Familiar Attorney: My mistake then, because I was trying to convey that you don't have any shot
Maggie: You're an object of ridicule, a professional pariah, reduced to barely practicing law.
Eli: Thank you, I feel better.
Maggie: You're sucking up to God. There are better ways.
Eli: Yeah, well, God and I enjoy a pretty complicated relationship. At least now I'm starting to believe in what He wants me to do. (pauses) It's like I see things now, you know. Things that were always there but that I just never noticed before.
Maggie: Like people who need help?
I'm a lawyer, I look for loopholes.
Jordan
Jordan: Flattery and judicious use of loopholes: clearly you know the way to my heart.
Eli: Sir, you have to tell Solinsky that I'm unavailable... tell him anything... tell him I got hit by a bus.
Jordan: Even if I got to drive it, I couldn't do that...
Eli: Nate, the knight was you. An hour ago, you were chasing a dragon down Fossil Street on horseback.
Nathan: An hour ago I was here, asleep, and my horse hasn't been ridden all night.
Dr. Chen: (in Chinese accent) You always show up, no appointment! Dr. Chen not Jiffy Lube! Come back Friday.
Eli: I went to the doctor, the real kind. You wouldn't, uh, happen to have any needles for an inoperable brain aneurysm I inherited from my alcoholic father who I wrongly hated for 20 years?
Dr. Chen: (Chinese accent completely gone) Oh wow, that totally blows, bro.
