No [Andrew]'s not coming back. He's a coke fiend sex addict who wrote checks out of this company's account to buy hookers. So no, he will never work here again.

Ari

You know [Lizzie] fucked Andrew? That's what caused this whole spiral. It wasn't the drugs, it was her evil pussy that lured him in.

Ari

She looks great and she's single. You know what John Mayer said about her. Sexual napalm. You love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like victory.

Ari [to Andrew Sorkin about Jessica Simpson]

I'm now on Facebook because of you. I've got 600 friends. [Looks at Jessica Simpson] And John Mayer is not one of them.

Ari [to Andrew Sorkin]

Lloyd [about the dog]: Isn't he delicious?
Ari: Find something else to cook for dinner. Jessica is taking him.

Please don't tell me you're the one who picked up the straight Lizzie from the harsh gutter of life.

Ari [to Amanda]

I think your eye is growing cataracts because as you see by the day's events, anyone she wants or has, be it a sitcom actor or a circus freak, I'm going after.

Ari

It's not called show friends. It's called show business!

Drama

Mike Tyson: I wanna do like the black Brady Bunch. I'm trying to rehab my image. I want to spread some of that worldly wisdom that I picked up on my journey in life.
Ari: And then if Bobby doesn't listen to you, you bite his ear off.

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