Eric: What are you talking about? The only person you ever loved was yourself.
Drama: What's not to love?

Broken up and still pussy-whipped. That's just sad.


Turtle: You should get me on a talk show. I'd kill.
Shauna: Maybe I'll get you on Springer. Fat, little horny fucks and the women that despise him.
[Drama laughs]
Shauna: What are you laughing at? Maybe I'll get you on Montel with Don Swayze, Joey Travolta and the other retarded star siblings

Eric: We had breakup-sex, all right?
Johnny Drama: Breakup-sex? Never heard of it.
Eric: Yeah, I mean... you know... you have sex and... that's it.. you say goodbye.
Johnny Drama: ...that's the only kinda sex I have

Emily: You smoke?
Eric: Cigarettes? Um..yeah. I mean I've been trying to quit...umm recently.
Emily: How hard are you trying?
Eric: umm..not that much.
Emily: Good.
Turtle: I thought he quit.
Drama: Cigarettes, not pussy

The movie's called Head On, its a cool movie. See it this weekend. Your guaranteed to love it or your money back... from the studio, not from me


Bar's over there. Girls everywhere..

Jessica Alba

Ari: You wanna hug it out?
Eric: No, not really...
Ari: Come on... Let's hug it out, Bitch.

Ari: What are you doing bringing up a bad review?
Eric: You said it doesn't matter...
Ari: It does matter

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