Family Guy

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Ah, Brian on a date hmm, that'd be more pathetic than that game of marco polo I played with Helen Keller.

Stewie

Lois: Oh by the way Bonnie, we just finished reading the Da Vinci Code at my book club, you were right, its terrific!
Stewie: OH let me guess, some flowery 300 page menopausal, masturbatory aid.

Peter: Me, go to a PTA meeting? What, are you high?
Lois: Nah, not anymore, I crashed hours ago. By the way, we're out of chips, cookies and Funnybones.

Brian: What the hell is this?
Mayor West: It's creamed corn. I brang it from home because I don't like the creamed corn they have here. It's too crunchy.

If I drive, I'll have to have a couple of drinks first because I am very self-conscious about my driving.

Brian: What happened to your good buddy James Woods?
Peter: He was having trouble catching things in his mouth. What happened to your girlfriend?
Brian: Same problem.

Displaying all 6 quotes

Family Guy Season 4 Episode 11 Quotes

If I drive, I'll have to have a couple of drinks first because I am very self-conscious about my driving.

Peter

Brian: What happened to your good buddy James Woods?
Peter: He was having trouble catching things in his mouth. What happened to your girlfriend?
Brian: Same problem.

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