Season 8, Episode 6: "Quagmire's Baby"
Joe: We shouldn't let this ruin our night, let's just enjoy the strippers.Peter: I guess, I just hate how much that one gets into her work.
Stripper: You boys have been very naughty. I'm gonna have to assign you extra homework.
Peter: Fractions are so hard, what'd you get for number four?
Joe: She says don't share answers!
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Brian [about puddle of clone]: I'm not proud of this, but i'm gonna have to lick that up.
• Rating: 9.5 / 10 • Permalink
Quagmire: How long you been in beauty school?
Candy: Two months.
Quagmire: Well tonight, we're doing facials!
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Quagmire [reading note]: Glen, this is your child, next time wear a condom jerk. Oh my god!
Peter: Wait, hang on, there's no guarantee it's your baby.
Baby: Gigitty.
Quagmire: Ooh, I say that.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Stewie: It's healthier than what they ate in the fifties...
Customer: Steak and donut sandwich please.
Waiter: You want cigarettes on that sandwich.
Customer: What do I look like a Mary? Of course I want cigarattes.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Stewie: Hey will you take me down to Baby Gap? I want to dress like a small douche.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Season 8, Episode 5: "Hannah Banana"
Monkey: Ms Cyrus, I ask you to stop what you're doing. I don't just mean this. I mean the show, the music, the movie, it's all just awful• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Brian [about robot Miley Cyrus]: You think she does other things like a real girl, if you reprogram her?
Stewie: Brian's that sick. She's 16
Brian: I'm 8
Stewie: You're right, I'll see what I can do
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Peter: Lois, could you tell Chris that I'm sorry that I ever planted the seed version of him in your vagina?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Chris: That's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. Thanks evil mon.... thanks monkey
Monkey: I'd get up to hug you but sitting down is the only thing keeping the poop in
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Total Quotes: 545
