Family Guy

Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX
Family guy
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Hey, I'm not just a poorly-cleaned butt. There's a whole man around man around that you have to please.

Peter

Lois: Are you and Glenn thinking about children?
Charmese: Unfortunately, I can't have children.
Lois: Oh. Menopause?
Charmese: No, I got knifed in the vagina one Christmas.
Brian: Oh, the holidays are always stressful.

Meg, you look pretty next to [Charmese].

Stewie

You know, after 40 years in my line of work, I've learned the difference between true love and doing the entire bowling team of a pizza restaurant on a box spring by a brook. This is true love. Hey, what's our last name again?

Charmese

Stewie: You should know that Mom has emotionally let you go. It won't be long before she takes another.
Peter: Owww, my head!
Stewie: She already has two cell phones.

Hey, was Beowulf a Teen Wolf sequel with Scott Baio?

Peter

Peter: Lois, do you have any idea what i'm looking at right now?
Lois: Peter, we're not doing this again.
Peter: I am at Harvard, the smartest school in the country. And they have...
Lois: Peter, breakfast for dinner is anarchy!
Peter: It's fun, Lois! It's whimsical!
Lois: It's ridiculous! Pancakes are not a nighttime food!
Peter: You're ridiculous!

Joe: Are we sure this is the way to the dining hall?
Quagmire: Oh, I'm sorry, are your feet getting tired? God, I'd love to be able to wheel around in a toy all day.

I love eating food that's sad.

Quagmire

Bonnie's making wallets now. Look, she's gonna ask you guys to buy one, I'll just give you the money, just don't throw it out within 5 miles of where we live.

Joe
Displaying all 10 quotes

Family Guy Season 11 Episode 11 Quotes

I love eating food that's sad.

Quagmire

Bonnie's making wallets now. Look, she's gonna ask you guys to buy one, I'll just give you the money, just don't throw it out within 5 miles of where we live.

Joe