Friends

Friends "The One with the List" Quotes

Chandler: This must be so hard. "Oh no! Two women love me! They're both gorgeous and sexy! My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight!"
 • Rating: 3.5 / 5.0

Joey: Ross, listen. I got two words for you: Threesome.
Chandler: You still got one word left if you want to use it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: All right, check out this bad boy. Twelve megabytes of RAM, 500 megabyte hard drive. Built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 BPS.
Phoebe: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
Chandler: Games and stuff.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Phoebe: (Sampling Mockolate chip cookies) Oh, sweet lord, this is what evil must taste like!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: (Making up a story instead of reading The List) It was summer ... and it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. "Oh look!" cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The end.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Rachel: Ross kissed me.
Phoebe: No!
Monica: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!
Rachel: It's unbelievable.
Monica: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!
Phoebe: Ok, alright we wanna hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug the phone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need tissues?
Rachel: Ohhh it ended very well.
Monica: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!!
Phoebe: Alright, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like...was it like, a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, y'know, "I gotta have you now" kinda thing?
Rachel: Well, at first it was really intense, y'know, and then...oh god, and then we just sorta sunk into it...
Phoebe: Ohh, so, ok, was he like holding you or were is hands like, on your back?
Rachel: No, actually first they were--they started out on my waist... and then they slid up, and then they were in my hair...
Phoebe & Monica: Ohhh...
(Scene changes from the girls' apartment to the guys' in which they are eating pizza around the foosball table)
Ross: And then I, and then I kissed her.
Joey: Tongue?
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: Cool.
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.
Ross: He won't? (Realizes why) He won't!
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: Oh! I do not have chubby ankles!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: My diary! My diary, that's brilliant. I should have told her it was my diary. She never would have made me read her my diary.
Monica: You know, that's true. You'd be a great person to have around the day after an emergency.
 • Rating: Unrated

Rachel: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, (Mocking Julie) "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
Phoebe: No offense, but that sounds nothing like her.
 • Rating: Unrated

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