Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?

Brittany

Your hair looks like a briar patch. I keep expecting racist, animated Disney characters to pop up and start singing about living on the bayou.

Sue

I will no longer be carrying around photo ID. Know why? People should know who I am.

Sue

I'm so depressed I've worn the same outfit twice this week.

Kurt

I'm pretty sure my cat is reading my diary.

Brittany

Rachel: Break a leg.
Finn: I love you.

I want Channing Tatum to stop being in stuff.

Mike

[God] makes me gay and then makes His followers go around saying it's a choice, as if I'd choose to be mocked every day of my life.

Kurt

When I heard Sandy wanted to write himself into a scene as Queen Cleopatra, I was aroused. And then furious.

Sue

Rachel manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.

Kurt

My mom won't even let me watch Twilight. She says she thinks Kristen Stewart seems like a bitch.

Tina

[to the panel] Okay. I'm just gonna come out and say it. This is a singing competition. I don't know how those deaf kids got in. They weren't singing, they were like honking and everyone was crying and I was like, "Get off the stage. You're terrible and you're making me super uncomfortable."

Candace

Glee Quotes

I'm gonna miss all of you. I love you guys.

Puck

When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist.

Brittany