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I realize you're only half orangutan, but I'm still allergic to your lustrous, ginger mane.

Sue [to Emma]

Tina: Last week we were too sexy, this week we're too religious -- we can't win.
Brittany: Now I know how Miley feels like.

I don't believe in God, Dad. But I believe in you, and I believe in us.


You didn't hurt Sam. It was a 300-pound left tackle who just got expelled because he's on steroids and he's 23.


Mercedes: You get to wear a fabulous hat.
Kurt: You had me at fabulous hat.

I don't need to sit around and listen to all you mental patients tell me there is a God when I know there really isn't.


Asking someone to believe in a fantasy, no matter how comforting, is cruel.


I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, and I guess I don't have to. Mary Lou Retton is an orphan or something.


I made him a card that said 'heart attacks are just from loving too much.'


[God] makes me gay and then makes His followers go around saying it's a choice, as if I'd choose to be mocked every day of my life.


They choose totally go to Jew church and wear those hats and eat that salty orange stuff with their bagels.


Is God an evil dwarf?

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 21 in total

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Glee Season 2 Episode 3 Quotes

When I pulled the sandwich out, I saw the face of God. Literally.


I sort of worship Eric Clapton and Ochocinco.

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