Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl Season 5 Quotes (Page 19)

Season 5 Episode 4: "Memoirs of an Invisible Dan"

Gossip Girl: Looks like it's going to be a hot time in this old town tonight. Let's just hope Lonely Boy and his book don't go up in flames.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dan: I'm sorry to call everyone here on such short notice, but... Alright, you know how there's been all this speculation about the book that's being published by an anonymous author.
Nate: Yeah. Gossip Girl said it was about us.
Blair: Yeah, it was probably written by some loser who doesn't even know us.
Dan: Well not exactly. I am that loser. I wrote it. And it is based on you. All of you. Sort of.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dan: Hey, everyone. Thank you so much for coming.
Serena: I only have five minutes.
Blair: This better be really important.
Nate: What is this all about?
Lily: Is everything all right?
Charlie: This isn't about me, right?
Rufus: Yeah. What's going on, Dan?
Chuck: This is going to be fun.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Nate: What are you guys doing here?
Blair: We must have all gotten the same text from Dan.
Rufus: The last time he was this secretive he showed up with a baby.
Chuck: Don't worry, you're not about to become a grandfather. Though Dan is about to give birth in another way.
Serena walking in: Okay, I'm pretty sure this is how every murder mystery begins.
 • Rating: Unrated

Blair: Do you know what this summoning is about?
Chuck: I do, but I can't say. I'm sworn to secrecy.
Blair: Since when do you bite your tongue?
Chuck: I'm learning.
Blair: Well isn't Humphrey becoming quite the drama queen.
Chuck: Isn't that usually your role?
Blair: I prefer drama princess now.
Chuck: How are you, by the way?
Blair: I'm okay. Thanks for asking.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Nate: Why do you even hold on to that phone if you're not going to answer it?
Diana: Because I don't want to have to explain how I got it. I am too intrigued by our mysterious Ivy to just toss it away.
 • Rating: Unrated

Diana: If only we had Blair Waldorf's phone.
Nate: I told you, she's my friend and my friends are off-limits.
Diana: Morals. How quaint.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jane: Daniel never agrees to do anything. The man took three years to make a pair of shoes.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Blair: You don't think your family's going to be upset, do you? I don't want them to think of me as the star of some trashy MTV show like, "Unmarried and Pregnant Princesses" or, I don't know, "Royally Screwed."
Louis: My mother will be over-the-moon. The job of any princess is to provide an heir to the kingdom. And that is exactly what you are doing.
Blair: An heir to a kingdom lives within me. How very Shakespeare.
Louis: Comedy not a tragedy, I hope.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Louis: You look gorgeous. I can't wait to tell the whole world the good news.
Blair: Me too.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Blair: I now understand why women used to go into confinement. It wasn't because of modesty, but vanity. My boobs. Oh, I'm huge!
Louis: Sorry, darling. I was just reading about how some pregnant women have mood swings. Apparently they didn't know you before pregnancy.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dan: I'm going to need six copies of this book. They should probably be hand-delivered.
 • Rating: Unrated

Alessandra: They're coming tonight, right?
Dan: To the book party? No. I haven't exactly mentioned it to them yet. But I'd have to tell them the book exists first.
Alessandra: They don't know? Not any of them?
Dan: No. I'm not sure they're going to like it when they find out.
Alessandra: If they're really your friends they'll be happy to see your star rise. And they should be at the soirée tonight. When everybody learns that Anonymous is actually Daniel Humphrey.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dan: Quick question: how big can my head get before it explodes?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 5 Episode 3: "The Jewel of Denial"

Gossip Girl: Get ready to find out what you're made of. Because to survive on the Upper East Side, you better be fearless. XOXO — Gossip Girl.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Gossip Girl: Face your fears and the rewards can be profound. You can discover the true depth of a relationship. Or what you're capable of withstanding. The problem is, the more you gain, the more you stand to lose.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Louis: You're pregnant? You're pregnant!
Blair: Oh, you're happy.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Gossip Girl: The true author of the tell-all tome has been revealed. And the author's name is one everyone will recognize. But the question is, will anyone want to say it again once the book is out?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ivy: I'm going to make sure that Cece reinstates your access to her checks.
Carol: You are on your own now. Good luck.
 • Rating: Unrated

Rufus: To my beautiful wife, her freedom, and the end of the ankle bracelet.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

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