Favorite Happy Endings Quotes
Old brad didn't take baths because his tub was filled with 311 CDs.
Jane
I'd rather be surprised by a disappointment than happy with what I expected. It's why I never ask if a pool is heated.
Penny
So you and the guys wanna go check out some porno? Get some eyes on some thighs? Some peepers on some creepers? Some rods and cones on some bras and thongs?
Jane
I can't help it, I love to hear the sound of bones crunching.
Alex
That's the last time I administer an at home "bro-zilian." Speaking of, Dave we need more duct tape.
Max
Your first email address was ThreesomeChaser@PulaskiHillsMiddleSchool.com.
Penny [to Dave]
You like Keri Russell after she ruined Felicity.
Penny [about Dave's perm]
Wow we really are losing the war on drugs if animals are blowing rails.
Alex
Grant is awesome. He's different than all the freaks you guys usually date.
Max
Jane: You create your own destiny, like Katniss Everdeen in The Hunger Games.
Penny: Oh I love those books, you read them too?
Jane: No those books are for nerds, but I knew it'd get your attention.
Why the long face Michael Phelps?
Brad
Max: You didn't like Ringling brother for brothers?
Brad: It would've been the greatest show on earf!
