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You can do whatever you want with Audrey Parker -- go steady, take her to the prom. I only want the original.


You are Audrey Parker. You don't give people Troubles. You save them.


We're gonna have to start calling you Obi Wan. You're our only hope.


Jennifer: How do you feel about dating Hermoine?
Duke: Well, you know, we all have our stuff. I snore when I drink red wine.
Jennifer: Yes you do. Very loudly.
Duke: Very loudly

I don't want the magic beeping book. You keep it.


Sweet van you guys. What, you didn't want to spring for the airbrushed unicorn?


Nathan: Jennifer can do that?
Dwight: As far as I can tell, everyone younger than me can do that.

OK - We've all seen Real Bigfoot Housewives. Nobody takes these conspiracy guys seriously.


Duke: I was a cop?
Audrey: Yeah, a really good one.
Duke: And William shot me? I gotta get a bigger gun.

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