[after his ankle monitor went off] I thought the bracelet was decorative. My aunt had one just like it. Wait a minute...

Giving House a computer is like giving plutonium to Dr. No.

Wilson

You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn't perfect. That's why you married a man who was dying of cancer. You don't love, you need, and now that your husband is dead, you're looking for your new charity case, that's why you're going out with me. I'm twice your age, I'm not great looking, I'm not charming, I'm not even nice. What I am is what you need...I'm damaged.

You have decades of experience dating and be attracted to losers.

House [to Cuddy]

[To Thirteen regarding his ankle ankle monitor] Guilty as charged. Literally.

Nolan: You're late.
House: You're fat.

No one's unhappy in Greece.

If you're gonna be this way, I'm not gonna invite you to my baptism.

Dr. Wilson: Cuddy will be home from work in six hours. But no big deal. I'll just scream, "Look over there," while you quickly shove a scope up her daughter's rectum.
House: I could offer to baby-sit again, let her have the night out.
Dr. Wilson: Sure. That won't raise any suspicions.
House: I wish I was nicer.

Thirteen: We all want the same things: love, forgiveness, chocolate.

Thirteen: I'm asking you to let it go.
House: And I really wish I was the kind of person who could do that.

Morgan: I had colds all winter.
House: Well, I've been in this room a while, but it's spring now, right?

House Quotes

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There's nothing any of us can do about it.

House

[Playing "My Heart Will Go On for Wilson] This is so our song.

House