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Thirteen: No one's going to risk their life to save hers.
House: Man, one false accusation from a psychopath, and you turned out to be a real bummer.

Dr. Wilson: Wait a minute, is that acutally a check for him?
House: No. It's a giant novelty item for winning the lottery. You're just standing really far away.

Psychopaths always fascinate me. I think it's their cultural literacy and strong family values. Or is that Jews?

House

House: Some idiot I went to med school with keeps leaving messages. Wants to drop by for lunch.
Dr. Wilson: So tell him no.
House: It's complicated.
Dr. Wilson: It's too complicated for you to tell someone you don't like to screw off? That's practically your hobby.

I'm gonna pretend to go to work now.

House

Chase: I give her a day, two days at the most.
House: Great! You be the clock. Everyone else be the doctor.

Even when you try to do something nice, you sound like a jerk.

Thirteen [to Foreman]

Have sex. Fight. Or quit. Whatever you're doing now isn't working.

House

Those of you who haven't slept together, you can go. Everyone else, stay behind.

House

Wilson: If there's any Karma in this, he's probably happier than you are.
House: Good point.

House: We're almost at my floor, so I'll summarize: you're problem, not mine.

Hi. I'm Dr. House. How long have you been a psychopath?

House
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