How I Met Your Mother

How I Met Your Mother "Belly Full of Turkey" Quotes

Barney: Helping people less fortunate than me is the greatest pleasure in the world.
Robin: Yesterday you said the greatest pleasure in the world was having your toes sucked. Then you asked for a high five . . . from your foot
 • Rating: Unrated

Robin: I am Canadian. Remember? We celebrate Thanksgiving in October.
Ted: Oh right I forgot. You guys are weird and you pronounce the word out, oot
Robin: You guys are the world's leader in hand gun violence; your health care system is bankrupt and your country is deeply divided on almost every important issue.
Ted: ... Your cops are called "mounties"
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: I've done so much good today, I've got, like, a "soul boner"
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

[about his community service]
Barney: I was unfairly punished because the wall belonged to the judge's church.
Ted: You peed on a church?
Barney: I peed in an alley which happened to have a church which I did not see, because I was drunk!
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Okay, Ted. I found a way for you to help someone, to do some good. This is Walter. Walter is homeless. And Walter would like a lap dance.
Ted: Are you joking?
Barney: I never joke about the sublime art of burlesque entertainment
 • Rating: Unrated

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