I'm afraid Duck Philips has tricked me into a job interview. I stand by my analysis, but I'm happy where I am.

Pete

You know, I'm jealous of your ability to be sentimental about the past. I'm not able to do that. I remember things as they were.

Trudy

It's OK for you to cry, honey. [breaks down sobbing] Jesus. What am I gonna do?

Henry

Joan: Cut it out, and don't make me come out here again.
Joey: Sorry, Mom!

There's a Joan at every company. My mother was a Joan. She even wore a pen around her neck so people would stare at her tits.

Joey

I should've finished high school. Everything could have been different.

Don

Joan: I really think this vending machine is a trouble maker.
Lane: I think it's been a great success. Revenue is climbing. I was gonna suggest we get a sandwich machine We'd probably get 40% of the work force keeping busy through lunch.
Joan: Or we'd end up with a bunch of fat secretaries who think the whole afternoon is lunch time because there's always another sandwich around the corner.

You want some respect? Go out there and get it for yourself.

Don (to Peggy)

Joan: I don't like sitting at my desk and looking into a garbage dump.
Joey: Although I am paid less, I am still not a janitor.

Don: I'm just gonna take you to your door.
Faye: And why is that?
Don: Because that's as far as I can go right now, and I'm not ready to say goodnight.
Faye: That's not what I expected.

I have to say, most of the things Negroes can't do, I can't to either...and nobody seems to care.

Peggy

Peggy: Should it be funny?
Don: Actually funny? Maybe. Funny like what I just saw? No.

Mad Men Quotes

Don Draper: Let me ask you something, what do woman want?
Roger Sterling: Who cares?

Psychiatry is just this year's candy pink stove.

Roger