Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail?

Nick

• Permalink: Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail?
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Have you seen a girl who looks like me, but with chaos in her eyes?

Jess

• Permalink: Have you seen a girl who looks like me, but with chaos in her eyes?
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Ooh, bonus shot of Dad getting a haircut while eating spaghetti!

Jess

• Permalink: Ooh, bonus shot of Dad getting a haircut while eating spaghetti!
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Girl, I got an obligation...at a...sandwich...meeting.

Winston

• Permalink: Girl, I got an obligation...at a...sandwich...meeting.
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Crazy girls are kind of my 'Hurt Locker.'

Schmidt

• Permalink: Crazy girls are kind of my 'Hurt Locker.'
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She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping.

Nick

• Permalink: She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping.
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I've got an uncle whose God-given name is 'Shifty.'

Nick

• Permalink: I've got an uncle whose God-given name is 'Shifty.'
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Jess, can I borrow your glasses? We're going to roleplay as you guys.

Schmidt

• Permalink: Jess, can I borrow your glasses? We're going to roleplay as you guys.
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What makes Abby's jewelry so interesting is that it is dangerous and can cut you

Schmidt

• Permalink: What makes Abby's jewelry so interesting is that it is dangerous and can cut you
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Quit sorting through my trash, Coach! You're messing it all up!

Schmidt

• Permalink: Quit sorting through my trash, Coach! You're messing it all up!
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You're Abby Freakin' Day. You can do whatever you want. Except vote.

Jess

• Permalink: You're Abby Freakin' Day. You can do whatever you want. Except vote.
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Jess: Why does your bottom need to breathe?
Nick: It's like a plant. It needs sun and air.

• Permalink: It's like a plant. It needs sun and air.
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