New Girl Quotes
Schmidt: Who let the dirty slut out of the slut house?
Jess [in a British accent]: Probably the slut butler, right!
So when I do the chicken dance I do it a little differently. Instead of doing claps, I like to do a peck. It's more realistic.Jess
Jess: $550 for the TV?! Seems a little steep. I'm gonna write down a figure, and this is as high as I'll go.
Pawnshop dude: You drew a smiley face.
Rochelle? Fancy name. 'Rochelle', like a mermaid.Jess
No! I can't call Spencer I haven't talked to him since he cheated on me with that ho! Actually, that's not fair. She might be a really nice ho.Jess
Jess, you know what, I'll let you check my lost and found...got sizes zero through ten.Schmidt
Jess: So Coach said they used to play basketball in college, but then Winston went pro?
Schmidt: In Latvia, okay? He went pro in Latvia. It's a big difference. The team logo is a fig. Just one single fig!
Jess (about Winston, the new roommate): I'm so excited to meet him!
Nick: No Jess, he's sleeping. He flew in late last night, we took him straight to the bar, took a bunch of shots, got drunk, screamed I love America.Now he's happily passed out.
I have to get to school cause it's astronomy day and I'm dressing up as Galileo, so I have to put on my beard.Jess
Schmidt: You consider me a sexy man, correct?
Jess: I don't know how to answer that question
I was going for like a hot farmer's daughter kind of thing, like, oh, I'm gonna go milk my cows.Jess
Jess: Who's that girl? It's Jess.
Nick: Did you just make up a theme song for yourself?