Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
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Kaboom is a word I made up. It's not in any dictionary. I trick people into building playgrounds in empty lots in their neighborhoods. It's an elaborate prank. For my next prank, I'm going to build a hospital in a poor part of China. They'll never see it coming.

Keef

How does taking risks make me feel? Amazing. Tingling sensation throughout my whole body. I feel flushed. My muscles are relaxed yet I feel awake. Just waves of pleasure. I wish there was something physical that could make me feel this way.

Leslie

Leslie, the man lived in a pit. OK, he couldn't find a place to live on the Earth's surface so he went under the ground. You're dealing with a grown man who thinks like a gopher.

Ann [about Mark]

Hey, Andy, it's your aunt. You mom or dad's sister. I don't know how to tell you this, but your uncle has passed. He's with Jesus now. So we're having a memorial in 30 minutes at City Hall.

Leslie [on Andy's voicemail]

If you want to meet, just put a white chalk X on the mailbox across the street from city hall. Or call me back. Just call me back.

Leslie [on Andy's voicemail]

Sometimes when you make an omelet you've gotta break a few eggs. What's the alternative? No omelets at all? Who wants to live in that kind of world? Maybe birds. Then all their babies would live.

Leslie

Andy [about Mark]: I don't get it. What does he have that I don't have?
Ann: Are you serious?
Andy: Yeah.
Ann: Everything. He has literally everything you don't have. A job, a car, a steady income, an address, a second pair of shoes, table manners, the ability to say tampon without giggling.

Leslie: Hey, can I smoke in here?
Ron: You don't smoke.
Leslie: Just askin' if I can.
Ron: Are you high?
Leslie: I'm high on kaboom.

Ann: We should have checked before to see if you were... home.
Andy: Oh no, I told you. I moved out of the pit. I decided to go back because I forgot my headphones. And I laid down on this really comfy tarp, I saw this old cereal box I hadn't read before so I must have drifted off.

Say you had a friend who wanted to do something good, but a little risky and she was kind of nervous about it, and this friend is me. What should I do?

Leslie [to Ann]

Mark: Would you break the rules?
Leslie: I won't murder.
Mark: That's good to know.

I am so sick of moving like a slug. I want to move like a cheetah. Or a slug driving a remote controlled car. Something more plausible than that. But fast.

Leslie
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Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 6 Quotes

Tom: So, what does the Man Pillow look like?
Leslie: Daniel Craig. It's for my lower back.

Credit Card Rep: $20 to Netflix.
Leslie: Yup.
Credit Card Rep: $20 to Blockbuster Online.
Tom: Both?
Leslie: I needed all 11 discs of Gossip Girl at the same time.

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