Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
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With the government shut down, who's going to stop Al Qaeda?

Resident

No one is more upset about this than I am. Not like it's a competition or anything. 'Cause if it was, I would win, but that's neither here nor there. The point is I would win.

Leslie

Got a really good deal on my lease. Paying like 12 percent interest. That's like one of the highest you can get.

Andy

Andy: How long is it going to last?
Ron: If we're lucky this building will be empty for months.

Leslie: Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food?
Ron: People are idiots, Leslie.

Leslie: I really made love to the pooch on this one.
Ron: Screwed the pooch?
Leslie: I don't like that term. It's too vulgar.

I tried to Photoshop it to make it look like they were happy. It was really hard. Their mouths are so old.

April

You really shouldn't be leading us. If you're menstruating, you'll attract bears.

Clarence

Tom: We need to do something to distract from this... boring area. Now I didn't want to have to do this but we may have to go nude.
Ann: Goodbye, Tom.

Tom: In a million years, I never thought you'd be the problem with this photo shoot.
Ann: Didn't you just plan this like two hours ago?

Hey, if there's anyone out there that's doing a photo shoot about the dangers of eating undercooked chicken, I can give you Ann's phone number.

Tom

Tom: Come on, Ann, what are we doing? Maxim or Good Housekeeping?
Ann: I'm not sure which one is the insult.

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 508 in total

Parks and Recreation Season 2 Quotes

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Don't teach a man to fish, and you feed yourself. He's a grown man. Fishing's not that hard.

Ron

Andy: April, you're like an angel with no wings.
April: So like a person?