As far as believing your promises, Paige and I are trying to start our own family right now, and when we do, my first promise will be to never let you near enough to hurt or disappoint our child.


Paige: It's just so wild to think that some time soon, that some of your sperm are going to meet some of my eggs.
Evan: I know. I know. I hope they hit if off.

If you insist on having it all, you might end up with nothing.


We’ve emptied your bladder, filled you full of antibiotics, and away we go!


Has anyone ever told you, you remind them of a Bond villain?


You look like something's wrong. Did you have to euthanize the Saab?


You haven't settled in at all since you started HankMed. You've got no possessions, no mortgage, no girlfriend, no boss. You've got nothing.


Ken Keller's not going to die. Not on my floor and not in my sweats.


Radiation isn't a play thing but a half life is better than no life at all.


So I'm the wounded antelope instead of the lion?


Evan: Is she the hoarder?
Paige: When clients are as wealthy as Ms. Jeffries, we call them collectors.

Hans: I hit my face on the ice and broke the floor of my eye socket. I was saving my little brother when he fell through.
Hank: Of course you were.

Royal Pains Quotes

Hey Donna - she's hot!


Hank: What's going on?
Jill: They're filming a realty TV show. Apparently all you need is a camera and people with no shame.