Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
If you are going to stay with the Todd, you are going to have to hammock up.
Todd
Ron: Will you be joining us for dinner?
Jordan: No way. Every time we go out, the whole night turns into a giant pissing contest.
Dr. Cox: Tell me this, how's that super sexy mother of yours? She annihilates me!
Ron: You know what, your crush on my mom was cute when we were fourteen, but the woman's 85 now. You need to back off. Or we can ask her out to dinner. I'll have her pop in her "going out" teeth and you two can see if there's any real spark.
Ron: So look at you, Mr. Big Time Doctor!
Dr. Cox: How about you, Mr. Big Time...I don't actually know what you do.
Ron: Man, I've told you a hundred times: I run mergers and acquisitions for a large private equity hedge fund... You've forgotten already, haven't you?
Dr. Cox: No, no. You do hedge clippings for a big farm.
Ron: Wha?
Dr. Cox: You privately acquire hedgehogs... Oh, come on, you got a hog farm. Gimme a break.
Dr. Cox: Look, why don't you bring Nathan over to our place tonight? The kids can play, and we can forget all about this competition crap.
Ron: I'd like that.
Dr. Cox: So would I... Jack is going to kick Nathan's ass at playing!
Dr. Cox: All right, Jack, listen to me. Ron's in the bathroom diapering his kid. When he gets out, it's playtime. And, son, lately your coloring's been sloppy and your Elmo song - well, unfortunately, it's lacked heart. Now you and I, we both know that your super-secret go-to toy are your building blocks. Well, it's time to shine, Jackie Cox. It is time to shine. Earn daddy's love on three. One, two, three - earn daddy's love!
Ron: 27-second diaper change.
Dr. Cox: I can change a diaper in twenty seconds.
Jordan: Oh, my God!
Turk: Whenever J.D. and I are bored, we like to play a little game called "toe or finger"?
Carla: Uh-huh?
Turk: You close your eyes, and I run either a toe or finger underneath your nose and try to guess which one it is!Turk: You close your eyes, and I run either a toe or finger underneath your nose and try to guess which one it is! Huh!? Fine. What do you want to do?
Carla: Usually when J.D. gets off work, we gossip about hospital stuff.
Turk: Baby, that sounds a little immature.
J.D.'s Narration: All right, Carla calls the shots. Appeal to her rational side.
J.D.: Carla, I totally understand you guys need your space, but with work and my financial situation, finding a new place is gonna be, minimum, two to four years.
Carla: Come on, Bambi. Aren't there any other married couples that want to live in a small apartment with a 29-year-old man?
J.D.'s Narration: She called me a man! Okay, time to play the best friend card.
J.D.: Turk, I've always had your back and you always had mine. Are you sure you want to go through with this?
Turk: It was my idea.
J.D.: I banged your first girlfriend.
Carla: Wanna do it on J.D.'s bed?
Turk: I think it's about time someone did.
Janitor: So I hear you're homeless. I wanna volunteer, give you a place to stay.
J.D.: I don't think so, buddy.
Janitor: Listen, crash in my garage. I guarantee you there will not be another person in there.
J.D.: You're gonna slather jam on my face and sic a family of raccoons on me, aren't you!
Janitor: Damn it. I've become predictable.
Perry, if I'm gonna be spending a lot of time with someone else's child, it's gonna be with our neighbor's 17-year-old. And don't think he hasn't asked. Oh...Pablo. Mm.
Jordan
Dr. Cox: Ron's kid doesn't make eye contact, he barely speaks, and he freaked out when you tried to cuddle him. I mean, hell, if he was an adult, he'd be, well...you know...me. But those behaviors in a child could point towards Autism. I think it's pretty obvious what we have to do.
Jordan: Grit our teeth, get through the weekend, never speak to Ron again?
Dr. Cox: Exactly.
