It was awesome. Lucy beat the crap out of Trey. Best girl fight I've seen since I paid those two lady janitors to wrestle.

Cole

Your last tot beckons me.

Russel

If I'm gonna be jealous of someone it's gonna be some dude who can breath underwater or Serena Williams. That ass is righteous.

Turk

Russel: Jambo doctors. That's Swahili for hello or good morning.
Turk: Oh is it really? I know what it means. I had a jambo juice this morning. A berry blast with echinacea boost. It was delicious. I'm going to live forever, you're gonna be dead. I'm gonna be alive! Alive!
Denise: Wow, sure you didn't get a fem boost in there? That was pretty catty.

Dr. Cox: I have a hospital full of incompetents hammering me with asinine questions every second of every day.
Todd: Uh Dr. Cox, your patient in three is septic. Antibiotics or vasopressors?
Dr. Cox: Antibiotics first.
Drew: That wasn't so dumb.
Dr. Cox: Wait for it...
Todd: Oh did you get my request for scrubs that hug a little closer to my wham bam?
Dr. Cox: Thank you Todd for being the example to a point you don't understand.

Turk: Somebody is parked in my spot!
Dr. Kelso: Boo hoo, it takes me eleven minutes to pee.

Lucy: Drew, you're our leader, let's get this going.
Drew: Get what going? I rarely listen to you people.
Cole: Seriously Big D, if I fail out of here I have to go to med school in the Caribbean. Dude, I don't speak Caribbesian, so tell us what to do!

Turk: Where's my pastry?
Denise: Too sugary.
Turk: Nothing's too sugary woman
Denise: Tell that to your diabetes.

How darn good is it to me right now? "Just this side of fabulous" is the answer.

Dr. Cox

This place is straight up Chuck Norris, tough as balls.

Cole

I'm gonna go ahead and give you a pass, because you have murder eyes.

Dr. Cox [to Denise]

Here's what I'm gonna do if someone doesn't tell me who did. I'm gonna make you all retake the test. It's going to be you a new test, it's gonna be ten times as hard. It's not just gonna be on medicine, it's going to be on everything. Baseball, statistic, North Dakota high schools, the geography of a made of fantasy world I like to call Coxatopia. That's a magic land where where rivers run of scotch and hordes of pigs feed on the bones of cheating med students.

Cox

Scrubs Season 9 Quotes

Don't smell people, it's weird.

Denise [to Lucy]

Thank you so much for making mommies boobs so big, they're almost juggs.

J.D. [to Elliot's belly]