Think of Sheldon when you apply it.

Penny (hands Howard the coupon)

Penny: "50 cents off Vagisil"
Sheldon: Think of me when you apply it.

Sheldon: Careful, Amy. The friend of my enemy's girlfriend is my enemy.
Amy: Really?
Sheldon: Yes. You're either with me or against me.
Amy: Do you want to take the bus to work?
Sheldon: Maybe there's a third option.

Penny: He's still mad at Leonard, huh?
Amy: Well, he's mad at you, too. He said you were the succubus that led his friend astray.
Penny: I don't know what succubus is, but it has "suck" in it, so that can't be good.

Howard: No, I am definitely up a cup size.
Raj: You, know, b-but they're very firm, so you've got that going for you.
Howard: You think?
Raj: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very perky.
Howard: Thank you. I really needed to hear that today.

Hey, easy. My nipples are sensitive.

Howard

Jump up and down -- let's see if they jigggle

Raj

I need you to be honest with me. Do my boobs look bigger to you?

Howard

Sheldon: Now I think I hear kissing.
Amy: Like you know what kissing sounds like.
Sheldon: There's kissing in Star Trek, smarty-pants.

Sheldon: Amy, there were Chinese food containers ... in the trash can.
Amy: Poor Leonard.

Howard: I feel so stupid. And fat.
Bernadette: That's okay. You still look great to me. In fact, why don't we go in the bedroom and I'll prove it to you?
Howard: Sex? Really? That's just your solution for everything.

Howard: You're full of estrogen and you don't act like that.
Bernadette: That's 'cause I'm a woman. I've had years of practice riding the dragon.

The Big Bang Theory Season 7 Quotes

Howard: There's a party for incoming post-docs tonight. Go to it and meet someone who isn't made of grease or pie.
Raj: You think you're so cool because your wife is a person?

Sheldon: Even the dung beetle chooses to plot its course by using the Milky Way.
Raj: Is that true?
Sheldon: Everything I say is true. Now, of course, the dung beetle also enjoys eating fece, living in feces and making little balls out of feces. So, pick and choose which aspects of its lifestyle you want to embrace.