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Everywhere I look it's Betty White this and Betty White that. Finally a kid who's not talking about Betty White. Of course I follow him.

Creed

He's been trashing us relentlessly on Twitter. Now it's funny stuff, but mean.

Creed

Pam: Dwight! What are you doing? We've only been in here for like two seconds!
Dwight: I've got 56 ounces of fluid in my bladder and we have to establish a pee corner!

The elevator's disobeying us!

Dwight

Michael: You don't have all the facts.
Jo: Which are?
Michael: I love him.
Jo: How far has it gone?

Oscar: If there's nothing wrong with this Michael, why have you been keeping it a secret?
Michael: Because I wanted you to come to me and say "Wow, he is so great" and I was gonna say "Well it's in the genes." And I was actually gonna be wearing jeans...and I'd point to them.

Do you think they should have had open auditions for the band Hanson? What if no one named Hanson showed up? That wouldn't even make sense. Or what if they just hired the littlest kid, and a 50 year old guy...who was a murderer? Really safe.

Michael

The last time I saw Luke was the opening day of Ace Ventura 2, and that was '95, so yes...15 years on the dot.

Michael

Dwight: Bigger the key chain, more powerful the man.
Jim: That's right...janitor said that.

Hey, Dwight I don't know if you've heard, but we're supposed to be drinking out of weird back packs instead of cups like regular people...oh you did hear.

Jim

...because I had a great summer. I got Wes Nile Virus. Lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. Stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected even though I peed on it. Saw Inception, or at least I dreamt I did.

Michael
Displaying all 11 quotes

The Office Season 7 Episode 1 Quotes

Hey, Dwight I don't know if you've heard, but we're supposed to be drinking out of weird back packs instead of cups like regular people...oh you did hear.

Jim

...because I had a great summer. I got Wes Nile Virus. Lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. Stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected even though I peed on it. Saw Inception, or at least I dreamt I did.

Michael