The Office

The Office "Sexual Harassment" Quotes

Jim: What has two thumbs and hates Todd Packer? This guy!
 • Rating: Unrated

Todd: What has two thumbs and likes to bone your mom? THIS GUY!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Pam: Usually on sexual harassment day everyone harasses me... as a joke.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dwight: You said we could come to you if we had any questions. (Pause) Where is the clitoris? On a website it says "At the crest of the labia." What does that mean? (Pause) What does the female vagina look like?
Toby: Technically, I am in Human Resources, and Dwight was asking me about human anatomy. Um... I'm just sad the public school system failed him so badly.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: What if Pam was a lesbian?! What if she brought her partner into work, would that be crossing the line?
Toby: No!
Michael: What if they made out, in front of everybody...
Toby: Well, that would be...
Michael: ...at home? And I told everybody everything about it?
Toby: OK, I'm lost.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: And, even though we're still a family here at Dunder-Mifflin, families grow. And, at some point, the daddy can't take a bath with the kids anymore. I am upper management, and it would be inappropriate for me to take a bath with Pam, as much as I might want to.
[cut to interview]
Pam: He said WHAT?
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: When I said that I was king of forwards, you got to understand that I don't come up with this stuff. I just forward it along. You wouldn't arrest a guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Todd: Where's Michael Snot? Sniffing some dude's thong? Probably.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: Todd Packer and I are total BFFs, Best Friends Forever. We came up together in sales, one time we went to a bar and met these set of twins. And Packer said that we were brothers, one thing lead to another, and we took them to our hotel room... and Packer did BOTH of them! It was awesome!
 • Rating: Unrated

Pam: I'd just like to say that, my Mom's coming in today.
Kevin: Mmmmilf.
Pam: Thanks Kevin.
 • Rating: Unrated

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