Dwight: What the hell is this? This is not Megadesk.
Jim: Oh! No, it's not. They call it Quad-desk.
Dwight: That's ridiculous, this is made up of three desks.
Jim: Oh my God. We're gonna have to rename it then aren't we.

Did I mess up my career today? My future prospects at Sabre, I dunno, there is a chance, yes. I'll tell you what I love my job. But Jo, wants me to put on a show for her and pretend to work late? I spent all day trying to make her like me that I forgot to ask myself something, do I even like her! As the Irish poet Bobby McFerrin said, don't worry be happy.


Michael: How late are we gonna work tonight?
Gabe: You never know with Jo. Sometimes we're here to midnight, sometimes she doesn't show up for three days.
Michael: Why does she do that. Why doesn't she just tell you what your schedule is.
Gabe: Yeah, that'd be awesome. I could get a girlfriend! I wouldn't have to go to Amsterdam seven times a year. But, uh, I'm young. Right? "I will date when I'm dead!"

Yes, I am anxious to get out of work. But let me be clear, it's not to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. It's so I can protest St. Patrick's Day.


Just because Jo, has no life, does not mean that the rest of us don't have lives. Oscar, has a life. I think Ryan has a life. This is outrageous.


Michael: Very nice!
Darryl: Not bad, huh?
Michael: A real hoop dream story you got there.

She should go home. It's not the end of the world. We'll go on a date next week. She's still gonna like me in a week. Right...?


Oscar: I have a question.
Michael: [whispering to Jo] Oscar, homosexual accountant.

Angela: Hey! Are you sick?
Erin: Oh, no, I just have a little indigestion.
Angela: In your nose.
Erin: Yes.

When you work for Sabre only one thing matters. And I don't care if you're a loser, orrrrr you practice bestiality. If Jo likes you, you are in. And I .... am in.


I'm a little sick but I don't want to miss my date with Andy. I'll get better. Whenever I get sick it goes away within a few hours. Except once when I was in the hospital, from age three to six.


Dwight: I'll tell you what happened to me. I didn't see my father for the first two years of my life. I thought my mother was my father, and my wet nurse was my mother.
Jim: Well that's a common mistake.
Dwight: Turned out fine for me. But Mose. Same story... Different. Ending.

The Office Season 6 Episode 18 Quotes

They say, that no man is an island. False. I am an island. And this island, is volcanic. And it is about to erupt, with the molten hot lava... of strategy.


It is St. Patrick's Day. And here in Scranton, that is a huge deal. It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas.