The Office Season 6 Quotes
Dwight: Pam would you care for a bagel?
Pam: Oh, no thank you.
Dwight: Oh, that's right, you're a woman and you need to refuse food the first time. I'll try again. Please Pam, reconsider and have a bagel.
Pam: I have an early lunch.
Can't a guy just buy some bagels for his friends so they'll owe him a favor which he can use to get someone fired who stole a co-manager position from him anymore? Jeez. When did everyone get sooooo cynical?
Dwight
Birthday lunch. Birthday lunch, there is no better medicine than birthday lunch. It'll cure all of your "Gee I don't know if Michael should be dating my mother." And fixes all occurrences of "I don't really see them together." So, open wide, Pam, and take a big ol' spoonful of birthday lunch medicine... Take with food.
Michael
You give me a gift? Bam! Thank You note. You invite me somewhere? Pow! RSVP. You do me a favor? Wham! Favor returned. Do not test my politeness.
Andy
I used to love coming here. The chicken parm is good, big part of my childhood. Oh! Maybe Michael will start dating that too.
Pam
Pam: You're bribing me.
Michael: No! No, no... Unless you want me to! Do you want me to? Because I will. I will bribe you. No... Your face is saying, don't? Unless I haven't offered you enough? Your face isn't changing. What is it! Talk to me face, tell me what Pam's brain is thinking.
Pam: The cake's really good.
Helene: Oh I know! I love when they use butter cream frosting.
Michael: Finish your cake, Helene. I want you to enjoy that cake. Because I have something terrible I need to tell you. And I want you to enjoy your cake before I tell you this terrible, terrible thing.
Ryan: Hey, quick question. Are you scared?
Michael: Never. About what? A little. What are you talking about?
Ryan: We heard about the punch.
Michael: What punch?
Kelly: Pam. She's gonna punch the crap out of your face after work.
Michael: I'm pretty sure we said slap.
Kelly: No. It's a punch. And Pam has that crazy pregnancy strength now.
Ryan: I'm getting concerned that you don't seem to understand what's going to happen. Do you?
Michael: I... umm... I'm good.
Ryan: Alright. See you there.
The only time you should care about a woman's age is if she is too young for you. And I am not robbing the cradle. If anything, I am robbing the grave.
Michael
As I watched Pam's big strong hand coming toward my face I saw my entire life flash before my eyes. And guess what? I have four kids. And I have a hover car and a hover house. And my wife is a runner and it shows. And Pam and Jim are my best friends and our kids play together. And... I'm happy and I'm rich and I never die. That doesn't sound like much, but it's enough for me.
Michael
It's actually not the first time I've been embarrassed by a pond. In high school, the girls volleyball team always used to throw me into the frozen lake. Four years in a row! Ohhhhhhhh it was freezing! No, no, no! Oh! This is even worse. Couple weeks ago I went to get a new cellphone and I wanted one of those packages, where you have the five, you know, friends, friends and family thing. And the guy was like, "who are your five friends" and I'm like, "uhhh." I didn't even know! I couldn't even think! Oh my God it was so embarrassing! That was - I don't even have Jan's cellphone number! And I hate her! She won't give it to me! I was like "oh I guess I'm a loser." A looooo-ooo-ooooser. Too far! God. Thanks a lot man! Thanks for the advice.
Michael
Michael: And then, I think I am going to go to the garlic festival.
Jim: Wow.
Michael: Sounds like fun. You guys would love it. They have a TCBY booth! Same stuff you get downtown. Do you like TCBY?
Jim: Who doesn't?
Michael: "I can't believe it's... I can't believe it's yogurt."
