The Simpsons Season 3 Episode 24: "Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?" Quotes
Doctor: This can't be right; this man has 104% body fat! Hey, no eating in the tank!
Homer: Go to hell!
Lisa: This award is the biggest crock I ever saw.
Bart: What about the Emmys?
Lisa: I stand corrected.
Homer: I miss my couch.
Joe Frazier: I know how you feel, you lost the couch, I lost the heavyweight championship.
Homer: PfftHeavyweight Championship, there's like, three of those!
Homer: All right, Herb. I'll give you the money, but first you have to forgive me and treat me like a brother.
Homer: All right, then just give me the drinking bird.
Marge: How was your day at work, dear?
Homer: Oh, the usual...stand in front of this, open that, pull down this, bend over, spread apart that, turn your head that way, cough...
Bart: Unckie Herb, what advice would you give to a young boy who would most likely become a bum like yourself?
Herb: Discarded pizza boxes are an inexpensive source of cheese.
Why did this have to happen now during prime time, when TV's brightest stars come out to shine?Homer
I used to be rich. I owned Mickey Mouse massage parlors and those Disney sleaze balls shut me down. I said "Look, I'll change the logo, put Mickey's pants back on." Some guys you just can't reason with.Hobo
Herb: Maggie...who brought me my fortune. I'll give you anything you want in the world
Maggie: -(machine)- I want what the dog's eating
Herb: I'll get you something nice.
Lisa: Why didn't you write Unckie Herb?
Herb: Hey, if I wrote to you what was I suppose to say? "Dear Lisa, last night I used a rat for a pillow thanks to your pop?"
Blablueeeh. (with the machine Herb invented) I have soiled myselfhow embarrassing.Maggie
(On his back, holding Maggie up) The pitch is insufficient for "burp me", and this jigsaw motion is something I've never(Maggie throws up on him) Eureka.Herb