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Smithers: I'm so happy I could hug you.
Mr. Burns: And have me smell like cheap drug store cologne the rest of the day? You may hug my shadow.

he will do my bidding... at that fantasy football auction and anything else my limited imagination can come up with.


This town can't teach its kids or collect its garbage, but we lead the nation in pointless revenge.


He was more than a friend. He was the reason I got up in the morning because he would inject me with coffee at six in the morning in the back of the head.


I want to die quietly on my own term crushing as many of those baby sea turtles as I possibly can.

Mr. Burns

Give him what he wants. He's the only tax payer in this town.

Mayer Quimby (about Mr. Burns)

Marge: This isn't a line for a movie, why are you dressed in that costume?
Comic Book Guy: Because I am afraid of needles, but Wolverine is not.

Please use your time in line wisely to Sophie's Choice your child.

Mayor Quimby

I'll have 37 snifters of your influenza syrup. One for me, one for Smithers, and the rest for my hounds.

Mr. Burns
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