The Sopranos Quotes
(on Don Vittorio) Ton', you give this guy a golf club he might try to fuck it.
Paulie
(after seeing Mt. Vesuvius) I'm going to tell Artie that mural they spent all that money on looks like a used Trojan compared to this.
Tony
Jimmy: Joey. Nice to meet you. You, Mr. Rude Cocksucker, see you around baby.
Big Pussy: Motherfucker, motherfucker!
It hurts like the fuckin' "Pit and the Pendulum" just to wipe myself.
Junior
[Angie is planning on getting divorced]
Carmela: So what did the lawyer say?
Angie: He said I have a good case. We're filing Tuesday.
Carmela: So you're going to take Monday to think. That's good.
Angie: Monday's a Jewish holiday.
Carmela: Tony, we can't just throw your sister out.
Tony: Why not?
Carmela: It wouldn't be Christian.
Tony: See? This shit works out. She's Buddhist.
Meadow: I could've taken ecstasy but I didn't.
A.J.: Don't puke on the floor.
Tony: What're you doin' up?! Go to bed.
A.J.: She fools around with ecstasy and you yell at me?
Carmela: (on Meadow) There has to be consequences. What kind of parents would we be if we let her get away with this?
Tony: Typical.
Janice: There's a Zuni saying: "For every twenty wrongs a child does, ignore nineteen."
Tony: There's an old Italian saying: "You fuck up once, you lose two teeth."
[Meadow trashed Livia's house]
Carmela: As a parent today, you are over a barrel no matter what you do. You take away her car you become her chauffeur. You ground her you've got to stay home weekends and be prison guards.
Tony: If you throw her out, social services will bring her back and we'd be in front of the judge. She's not 18 yet.
Carmela: That's your solution? To throw your daughter out?
Tony: All I'm sayin', with the laws today you can't even restrain your kid physically. She could sue you for child abuse.
Carmela: There has to be consequences.
Tony: And there will be, I hear ya okay. Let's just not overplay our hand. Because if she figures out we're powerless, we're fucked.
(to Tony) What's mine is not yours to give.
Richie
Look kid, I shouldn't have to explain myself. I'm from the old-school. You wanna raise your hand, you give her your last name. Then it's none of my fuckin' business. Until then, keep your hands in your pockets. We understand each other?
Richie
