Favorite United States of Tara Quotes
Can I ask you something, what does dogs in a bathtub mean?
Marshall
A person who stands for nothing spends their whole life sitting.
Lionel
Life is long and you're my man.
Tara: When have you become so perfect?
Max: Since Shoshana put me on a low dose of prozac.
Tara: I wish she could prescribe.
I'm green like that.
Kate
Marshall : She says she wants to be a celibate power couple.
Kate: Celibate power couple? That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Guy: Do you have any cake?
Kate: Cake? Why?
Guy: I was hoping you could sit on it.
Send a red carnation from your little closet.
Marshall's school friend
Charmaine: You need to focus on your attributes. Force yourself to take a compliment.
Marshall: Or can I force people to give them to me?
Oh, I don't wanna hear about anyone's vagina. Especially not a coupon-clipping mom vagina.
Marshall
Gene: You're the one.
Kate: No, I'm not.
Gene: Yes, you are. From the moment you walked in with that silly blue streak in you hair, I knew I would never be the same. As a manager or a man.
Kate: Wow.
Gene: Wow indeed.
Tara: You're looking up flights to Tokyo?
Kate: Yeah. Not that I'll ever be able to afford it on my sweat shop salary. How about this? Bus ride to Omaha, 45 dollars. Get a free fold-up chair.
Tara: Wow, you must be desperate. Something happened?
Kate: Yeah. I just kinda made a bad decision at work, so now I want to crawl out of my fucking skin. I just wish I could get away like you do.
Tara: Nah, it's not as glamorous as I make it look.
