You are brilliant when you're day drunk.

Reagan

You know those couples at the Waffle House who just sit there in silence, reading their Pennysavers, chawing on bacon just waiting to die?

Reagan

To precious fluids!

Scott

Reagan: Ramona and her pinot.
Chris: How long before she mentions her skin care line?

And Sandra, whats with the swing-set in the front yard? I mean what is wrong with you? Why are you all looking at me? You're all doin stuff! We're all doin stuff. That's right Paul! You either put a tarp on that Fiero or have it towed!

Chris

We could have been great together Ava and now I sell my blood for cash.

Walter

Hey quick question. Does AAA do houses?

Reagan

I am so calm, I could host a NPR show.

Walter

Chris: I just came to enjoy me a Diet Fresca.
Reagan: All Frescas are diet.

I lied to your face just to keep the peace.

Chris

Romance thy name is Christopher.

Ava

Scott: Hey you wanna go hit up Chuck E. Cheese right now? On me.
Chris: I dont know. Two dudes, one pair of pants, no kids? Not sure we're makin it through the door.

Up All Night Quotes

Who knows, maybe I'll get the old Nordic Track out.

Chris

Reagan: Stop saying baby in there, like there's a baby hiding in the closet with a knife or something.
Chris: Why are we whispering?