Wilfred Season 2 Episode 9: "Service" Quotes
Ryan: Another Hillary Swank dream?
Wilfred: She was wearing a g-string in this one. Ryan it was so real.
For God's sake, go participate in the most beautiful experience life has to offer even if it means looking directly into your own sister's slop hole.
Wilfred
If we make it to Victorville by sundown, I know a place that rents stilts...cheap!
Catherine
Ryan: Is that kitty litter?
Wilfred: There's still turds in it. Dibs!
Wilfred: Mexico? You know they eat dogs down there?
Ryan: They do not.
Wilfred: What, you don't think Mexico City has a Korea Town?
Ryan I know the timing couldn't possibly be any worse, but I think someone might have dug up Mittens and eaten part of the corpse.
Wilfred
You know what I say to people when they steal my lines? I say "Hey, hey, hey, it's Faaaaaat Albert!"
Wilfred
So you're no longer exclusively into Black love? Is that what you're trying to tell me?
Catherine
Remember when I mauled that Black teenager's face the other day? You think I did that because he had ice cream on his face? No. I did it because I hoped it would help him go on to be the next Seal.
Wilfred
I don't want to cast a darker shadow on an already tragic day, but I think someone may have eaten part of Jeremy's brains.
Wilfred
Did you see The Bachelorette last night? Brutal.
Wilfred
