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I wish I was a book. She could pick me up, flip through my pages. Make sure nobody drew wieners in me.

Troy

I wanna go to rehab and compare penises with famous people.

Troy

I live with that dude. He's got night terrors and a rotary phone.

Troy

Abed: For Greendale College Television, I'm Abed Nadir.
Troy: And I'm Troy "Butt Soup" Barnes. What? That's my name.

Troy: According to our polls, the campus is almost evenly divided. Now keep in mind, the margin of error on this thing is about 98%.
Abed: Could be higher. We don't even know how to do margins of error. We talked to two people at a vending machine.

I'm auditioning for Professor Garrity's all-black production of "Fiddler on the Roof." It's called "Fiddlah, Please!"

Troy

My uncle never put his finger in my plop-plop. I know, I'm bummed about it too.

Troy

My uncle put his finger in my no-no!

Troy

Annie: I lost Abed!
Troy: I told you to never let him out of your sight! That goes double for holidays and wax museums!

Do we want [Abed] to freak out and have to rescue him from some fantasy world where submarines are small enough to enter the bloodstream?

Troy

Annie: Shirley! We were just-
Abed:-about to-
Troy:-eat garbage dip! Why did I have to go third??

Kevin doesn't know about labor laws, or forty hour work weeks, or that that guy named him after his dog.

Troy
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 17 in total

Community Quotes

Annie: The midterm dance will need a visual theme. Like, 'Let's blow off steam,' and it's trains!
Chang: I have an idea!
Annie: Chang, your last idea was to murder.

Girls are supposed to dance. That's why God gave them parts that jiggle.

Troy
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