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Recap

Dwight is willing to go to extremes to try to teach a safety lesson. While this is the most hysterical five minutes ever, there are consequences to Dwight's escapade of starting a faux fire and sparking mass hysteria.

Stanley has a heart attack, which brings corporate into the situation and leads to Dwight's removal as safety officer. He nonetheless hijacks a CPR training session after the practice dummy "dies."

Michael realizes he's the cause of the stress in the office, and decides the best way to lighten the mood is to hold a roast... for himself. Everyone gets up and gives him their best shot, and obviously he's a bit hurt.

You knew Michael wasn't going to be able to take the cumulative effect of everyone ripping him. To Michael's credit, though, after he left the office to do his wallowing, he came back and delivered putdowns rapid-fire style.

That last one brought a chuckle from Stanley, and pretty soon the whole office is laughing, and the bad feelings are gone.

The Jim-Pam portion of the episode again shows their romantic story undercut (or supplemented by) the silliness of the movie they're watching and Andy's increasing frustration with what he thinks is their insight into it, but is really their dealings in their own lives.

Pam's dad has been staying with them while he and her mother go through a rough patch, but Jim says something that pushes dad over the edge.

What he said, though, was that he's never for a moment doubted Pam was the one, and it made Pam's dad realize he's never had that.

Which is sad, but at least lets Pam know that she's probably not headed down the same path. Pam says kids always think their parents are soulmates, but hers will actually be right.

In the background, Andy overhears and, still thinking they're talking about the movie, throws up his hands in exasperation.

Show:
The Office
Season:
Episode Number:
13
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The Office Season 5 Episode 13 Quotes

Michael: Jim: You're 6-11 and weigh 90 pounds. Gumby has a better body than you. Dwight, you're a kiss ass. Boom. Roasted. Pam, you failed art school. Boom. Roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom. Roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke and a dumb joke. Boom. Roasted. Creed, you're teeth called, your breath stinks. Boom. Roasted. Angela ... where's Angela? Whoa, there you are, I didn't see you there behind that grain of rice. Boom. Roasted. Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom. Roasted. Oscar, you are... [Stanley laughs] Oscar, you're gay.

Stanley you will not die! Stanley! Stanley, Barack is president! You are BLACK, Stanley!

Michael