Classic TV Quotes: The Simpsons Season Five

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While season four was admittedly our favorite Simpsons season, the fifth still had plenty of amazing episodes we still refer back to.  The season premiered with the amazing "Homer's Barbershop Quartet," where we got to see the story of the Be Sharps.

The Be Sharps

The season followed up with perhaps the best Sideshow Bob episode, "Cape Feare," and featured plenty of other memorable moments including Bart becoming Mr. Burns' heir, Lisa inventing her own Malibu Stacey doll, and Bart becoming a celebrity.

So what better what to remember all those memorable moments than with the largest collection of Simpsons season five quotes ever put together?  So what are you waiting for, go browse through our collection and vote for your favorite Simpsons quotes.

Here's just some of our favorites:

Barney: David Crosby? You're my hero!
Crosby: Oh, you like my music?
Barney: You're a musician? | permalink
Lawyer: What about that tattoo on your chest? Doesn't it say "Die, Bart, Die"?
Sideshow Bob: No, that's German for "The Bart, The". | permalink
Woman: No one who speaks German could be evil. | permalink
Homer: Look Marge, I'm sorry I haven't been a better husband. I'm sorry about the time I tried to make gravy in the bathtub. I'm sorry I used your wedding dress to wax the car. And I'm sorry--Oh well, let's just say I'm sorry for the whole marriage up to this point. | permalink
Homer: Maybe if we tied it down so it couldn't move it wouldn't get so hungry.
Lisa: You can't do that, Dad, it's cruel!
Homer: Oh, everything's cruel according to you. Keeping him chained up in the backyard is cruel. Pulling on his tail is cruel. Yelling in his ears is cruel. Everything is cruel. So, excuse me if I'm cruel! | permalink
Mr. Burns: Careful, Smithers, that sponge has corners you know.
Smithers: I'll go find a spherical one, sir. | permalink
Freddy Quimby: That's chowdah! Chowdah! I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you! Especially those of you in the jury! | permalink
Grampa: I'm in love... no wait, it's a stroke. | permalink
Lisa: Will you be lecturing from a standardized text or using the more Socratic method of interactive class participation?
Homer: Yes, Lisa. Daddy's a teacher. | permalink
Troy McClure: You may remember me from such self-help videos as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Confident, Stupid." | permalink

Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.


The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

You know, you remind me of a poem I can't remember, and a song that may never have existed, and a place I'm not sure I've ever been to.