Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce Season 2 Episode 9 Review: Rule #81: There's No Crying in Porn

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This wasn't the greatest hour of the series.

It feels like we're spinning our wheels a little bit, and Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce Season 2 Episode 9 didn't cover much new territory.

And to be perfectly honest, the show is suffering just a little bit from the loss of Jake. His character brought a really dynamic and lively touch to the series that is missing in his absence.

The Escort - Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce

The teeter totter these ladies are on is getting to be a little bit numbing.

Phoebe and her constant wheel of men. I mean, she's like one of the dudes who is always guided by her ding dong. She just walks from one guy to another with as if she's being dragged.

Was anyone surprised that she wound up with JD? That she was so direct was a little shocking, if I'm honest, as she was pushing the seduction considering the guy just told her he wasn't into her.

If Phoebe was the shy one and had just said she wasn't into JD, and he asked for a glass of water, and she returned to find him standing in his skivvies in the living room, would we have looked upon that whole scenario with the same eyes? I don't think so.

And what was Abby thinking? She has already determined (hell, probably more than once if we go back) that she's not into sex only. She wants a relationship. She has to stop trying to be someone she's not.

So what did she do? She took her freebee with Carl the escort and screwed him, thinking somehow that would make her feel better about what Harris was doing in Washington. 

I seriously doubt Carl was even good enough that Abby wasn't thinking about Harris during sex, saying to herself in her head: Aha! How does this grab, ya, Harris?! How is this for non-monogamy?

And I'm really not sure I get having Becca at her house with no Jake in sight. It's just weird. She's his responsibility, not hers. I initially thought she was just going to recuperate there after she fainted. But she moved in? I don't know.

The whole Delia and Albert situation? Well, Albert is a whore. Of course he is. And now Delia is just another conquest from the office. But at least she can take comfort knowing she wiped him clean of some valuables. 

It's funny that a CW actress learned that from playing a lawyer on TV. Wouldn't Delia have known that from, oh, you know, being a lawyer in real life? I guess you can't see it when you're a part of what's happening.

Finally, we have Jo. She had great news and not so great news. Frumpkis gave up the fight for Rize and they're essentially divorced. But her daughter wants to be a rich kid, enjoying hanging with her father and step mother far more than her own, real mother.

Considering the kid that Zooey is, that's not surprising, but it's still heartbreaking for Jo. However, she's also decided to take Scott up on his continued offer of friendship, and without Jake, I'll take it.

Joe continues to be the character who is resonating with me the most. She feels real to me. But that could change in a heartbeat. I'd really like this to be more about girlfriends and friendship, less about screwing the next guy on the corner. Those shows are easy. 

Programs about adult women who appreciate their friends? They're not a dime a dozen. They'd be appreciated a lot more if we could dig further into the relationships. They did that more in Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce Season 1 than this season. There were more characters, too.

I'm not sure what's going on. What do you guys think? I'd love your opinion. And tell me if I'm nuts, too, because I've been known to be that, too!

Don't forget you can watch Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce online anytime right here at TV Fanatic!

Rule #81: There's No Crying in Porn Review

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Rating: 4.7 / 5.0 (3 Votes)

Carissa Pavlica is the managing editor and a staff writer for TV Fanatic. She's a member of the Broadcast Television Journalists Association (BTJA), enjoys mentoring writers, wine, and passionately discussing the nuances of television. Follow her on Twitter and email her here at TV Fanatic.

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Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce Season 2 Episode 9 Quotes

Jo: Something terrible is happening.
Phoebe: What?
Jo: I still don't have a drink in my hand.

Look, porn is great for some things, but it's not real. It's super intimidating and half the things they show, women don't like anyway.