Best trip to the Zoo EVER!
The two-hour premiere consisting of Zoo Season 2 Episode 1 and Zoo Season 2 Episode 2 played quickly, with the pacing of a movie. It was nonstop madness and a lot of fun. It's exactly what I want during the summer.
The panic never quite felt as frenzied during Zoo Season 1 as it should have, but now people are giving our team PLANES!! Surely you don't get the most awesome plane EVER if we're not about to witness the end of the world as we know it, right?
The action started from the moments the credits rolled. And it had to considering where we left off last season.
If there was one thing we needed to see play out from the finale, it was how in the hell our heroes were going to get out of the pickle they were in with the giant animal herd blocking the street.
I'm pretty sure the out was a bit of a bait and switch, but it was a fun ride nonetheless. Jackson decided to build a wall of fire with his car, thereby creating a diversion so the others could run to safety.
Unfortunately, not only did the wall of fire somehow leave Jackson's life in a little danger, but the others? Well, there was not really any safety all that close to run to.
Unless you think hordes of swarming bees feel safe. That's not my go-to warm blanket feeling. Chloe heard screaming in a nearby car and had to rescue a baby because her mother was wearing a bee beard, and no, she wasn't with the circus.
So, yeah, this season, things are a bigger, faster and a whole lot scarier.
But the team didn't have much time to process what was going on with everybody else. Jamie had been located. Mitch was ecstatic. He was also referring to the arguing Jackson and Chloe as Danny and Sandy, so you knew he was very, very relieved he might be reunited with Jamie soon.
Except it never goes that well. Jamie was out in the woods when they arrived in an attempt to save the leopard, the animals then put pressure on the team and Abraham made the decision to leave Jamie behind again. Cue the argument between Mitch and Abe for the rest of the premiere.
Did Jamie have to go so far out to save the leopard? Oh well. Her move brought us the guy in this next photo, and I'm sure he'll cause problems with Mitch down the road. But until then, I'm not going to bother with Jamie anymore.
Because so much more was going on elsewhere! There was da plane. Da Plane!
There was Jackson's mutating blood. That's not good. It was especially terrible after they landed da plane in Argentina, found a bunch of dead guys and one badass cocky gal whose name I didn't catch, but who I know is played by Alyssa Diaz, so Alyssa Diaz it is.
And there was the mutant. On da plane.
Well, backup for a minute, because before the mutant was discovered, we thought it was just an animal or something taking everyone down to Soundgarden's Spoonman. Alyssa was kicking ass and not taking any names.
I don't know why Soundgarden was used. It surprised me and worked really well for the scene. I like those types of surprises.
Of course, mutant had a name, Kovacs. He was a doctor who arrived in Argentina not long before everyone else. Kovacs is the cautionary tale for Jackson. Kovacs makes finding the connection between Phase 2 and humans much more important.
Kovacs, up close, looks like pizza with bubbly, overly browned cheese. It's not pleasant. Not when you have a face as pleasant as Jackson's. I think I speak for everyone here when I say the team must do everything in its power to prevent Jackson from getting a melted over brown bubbly cheese face.
While Chloe and Mitch were trying to make sense of Kovacs, Jackson, Abraham and Alyssa were out in the wild. And man, was it wild out there!
Acid rain tinged with blood that came from vultures who were chowing down on the bodies the three of them were trying to find. They took note of the obvious when two vultures flew overhead carrying a dead body between them. It looked like Jurassic Park come to life.
What's amazing here? This is only the premiere. The sheer ridiculousness of everything that happens is utterly enjoyable on every level, even when it makes absolutely no sense. It's a flat out great time.
Just when you're wondering how they could wrap up this premiere with anything that could come close to what you've watched so far, Jackson stabs an elephant in the ass, runs back to the truck, and they're off, elephant in hot pursuit.
In Tom Cruise like fashion, Abraham tells his pals on da plane they better get it started, and leave the hatch open. Be ready to take off. They're coming aboard!
But, no. It's not over until the new gal shoots the most important dude on da plane right between the eyes. NOW what are they going to do? Will they find another mutant man to help save Jackson from undergoing the change?
I cannot wait to find out. The most enjoyable ride of the summer is back. We're at the Zoo!
If you need to catch up, you can watch Zoo online, right here at TV Fanatic.
Carissa Pavlica is the managing editor and a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.