I just never considered that it sometimes gets too hot in paradise.
"People do crazy things in the heat" was the theme of Hawaii Five-0 Season 9 Episode 3.
And everyone got into the act, putting out fires in the 100-plus-degree heat.
My favorite storyline was Tani and Junior, who, as the least-experienced members of Five-0, got loaned out to help with the heat-related crimes.
I'm still not sure where this pairing is going. He's so earnest while she's such a wiseass. Tani pretty well nailed it when she called him McGarrett Jr. while he was right that she has all the cynicism of Danny.
That's why it was such a funny moment when Tani finds Junior using her office to cool off (I'm guessing his office isn't that well equipped) while sitting bottomless in her chair. Yes, it was a perfectly guy thing to do, which he thought nothing off, and about which she didn't want to think.
Then there was their "cargument," as they picked at each other's habits. Tani even did a more-than-passable impersonation of Danny and his constant kvetching. It was like Hawaii Five-0 Jr.
Junior did what he does best when he talked down the man holding hostage the neighborhood kids who snuck into his pool. Too bad the guy was so impaired by his medication that he fell off the roof.
Junior has shown hidden depth during his measured induction into Five-0. He seems to know a little about a lot of topics, which comes out at the most advantageous of times.
He followed that up with something dumbass, leaving the keys in Tani's car, allowing it to get stolen.
It was after Tani blew up at him that we finally learned what had happened to Junior's sister, that a drunk driver had killed her. No wonder he has tried to do something meaningful with his life.
Finally, at the end, when her car died, they did the sensible thing: jump in the ocean. I was baffled that more people didn't do that to cool off.
They've been leaning toward becoming more than friends, and I thought maybe this would be the episode, but the skies opened up and ruined the moment. I still think it's going to happen sometime.
As for the original Steve and Danny, I'm going to say something that I often don't: Danny was right. They have a likely very expensive cooler at their restaurant, so let it refrigerate. All that ice would have been more useful sitting bagged inside the cooler, to keep it frosty.
Apparently, Kamekona wasn't too concerned about the stock at the restaurant, as he was hauling ice away, to get himself in trouble later.
McGarrett and Danny at least did some actual police work, tracking down the woman who killed two cops. This storyline really jarred against the lighthearted tone of the episode in general.
Yes, this was yet another variation of someone coming to Hawaii to hide from her past. The show is good for, what, three or four of those storylines each season. No wonder they can track down the person's backstory so easily.
And these storylines usually contain some ill-gotten gain that someone else is after, or, in this case, stumbles upon. Mayhem ensues.
Fortunately, the heat took out the perp, kind of a low-key ending for a storyline that started out with a bang.
Meanwhile, Jerry was doing his own brand of community policing.
He made the right call, coming down on the side of the man who tried stealing ice for his overheated, pregnant wife, giving that priority over the customer who wanted to make margaritas. It was smart thinking to bring her to the cooler case to cool down.
Grover was pure comedy relief, pigheadedly dragging that poor caddy around the course to witness the round of his life, complete with a Caddyshack reference. And he was right that no one would believe him without a witness.
When will Kamekona learn? Despite everyone telling him that it was a bad idea to price gouge an overheated mob, he did anyway, to predictable results. He deserved what he got.
It was a great last scene to "Singing in the Rain," as everyone got blessed relief.
It is just what was needed, something self-contained and none too strenuous after the uneven two-part CIA storyline opening the season. It brought back the fun.
To review that two-parter, watch Hawaii Five-0 online.
Which storyline did you enjoy the most? Did you ever think of Hawaii as being too hot? Shouldn't Dog have gotten more than one scene?
Dale McGarrigle is a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow him on Twitter.