Asta: Well, what you eat is important.
Harry: [laughs] I don't agree with that!
Asta: Oh, no?
Harry: No. There are ten things on here that are going to kill him sooner than eating bad food does.
Asta: Harry!
Patient: No, I want to hear. Sam never mentioned that. Kill me when? Look, I just turned 80. You can give it to me straight. How long do you think I have?
Harry: Do you like Christmas?
Patient: Yes, very much.
Harry: Celebrate it before June.


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Episode:
Resident Alien Season 1 Episode 2: "Homesick"
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Resident Alien
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Resident Alien Season 1 Episode 2 Quotes

Yeah, he's sick aight. [to Max] Let me ask you somethin'? You got HBO in your house? Here's what I want you to do. I want you to watch OZ Season 1, then come back and tell me if you want to go to prison. Talkin' 'bout some alien shit. I'm gonna go get me some mo' boxes.

Sheriff Mike

All beings in the universe are different. My people, for instance, are brilliant. Humans, on the other hand, are so dumb that they think the leading cause of death is heart disease. It's not. It's almond milk. Even the grey aliens won't touch the stuff. Despite their differences, there is one truth that connects all beings -- life doesn't ever go as planned.

Harry [internal]