Blair Waldorf Quotes
Dan: I'm sorry to call everyone here on such short notice, but... Alright, you know how there's been all this speculation about the book that's being published by an anonymous author.
Nate: Yeah. Gossip Girl said it was about us.
Blair: Yeah, it was probably written by some loser who doesn't even know us.
Dan: Well not exactly. I am that loser. I wrote it. And it is based on you. All of you. Sort of.
Dan: Hey, everyone. Thank you so much for coming.
Serena: I only have five minutes.
Blair: This better be really important.
Nate: What is this all about?
Lily: Is everything all right?
Charlie: This isn't about me, right?
Rufus: Yeah. What's going on, Dan?
Chuck: This is going to be fun.
Nate: What are you guys doing here?
Blair: We must have all gotten the same text from Dan.
Rufus: The last time he was this secretive he showed up with a baby.
Chuck: Don't worry, you're not about to become a grandfather. Though Dan is about to give birth in another way.
Serena walking in: Okay, I'm pretty sure this is how every murder mystery begins.
Blair: Do you know what this summoning is about?
Chuck: I do, but I can't say. I'm sworn to secrecy.
Blair: Since when do you bite your tongue?
Chuck: I'm learning.
Blair: Well isn't Humphrey becoming quite the drama queen.
Chuck: Isn't that usually your role?
Blair: I prefer drama princess now.
Chuck: How are you, by the way?
Blair: I'm okay. Thanks for asking.
Blair: You don't think your family's going to be upset, do you? I don't want them to think of me as the star of some trashy MTV show like, "Unmarried and Pregnant Princesses" or, I don't know, "Royally Screwed."
Louis: My mother will be over-the-moon. The job of any princess is to provide an heir to the kingdom. And that is exactly what you are doing.
Blair: An heir to a kingdom lives within me. How very Shakespeare.
Louis: Comedy not a tragedy, I hope.
Louis: You look gorgeous. I can't wait to tell the whole world the good news.
Blair: Me too.
Blair: I now understand why women used to go into confinement. It wasn't because of modesty, but vanity. My boobs. Oh, I'm huge!
Louis: Sorry, darling. I was just reading about how some pregnant women have mood swings. Apparently they didn't know you before pregnancy.
Blair: I am about to marry a fabulous man. Who happens to be a prince. I can't be this close to having all my dreams come true only to have them yanked away by one transgression at a stranger's Bar Mitzvah.
Dan: I know it's scary, but I think you should know who the father is. If not for yourself then for the baby.
Blair: I had hoped denial would last longer as a coping mechanism, but breast tenderness and morning sickness made that impossible.
Dan: You know, you do have options.
Blair: And I've considered them all. But no matter what, this baby was conceived out of love and... I'm gonna keep it.
Dan: If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're starting to like Brooklyn.
Blair: It isn't Brooklyn I'm here for. You're the only person I can have a furtive, emotionally-loaded conversation with right now. How's Chuck?
Dan: Ah... he's okay. Sort of. A long, Freudian story. How are you?
Blair: Beatrice. You have to understand, it's still so early. I didn't want to get Louis' hopes up if things weren't okay. I was going to tell him.
Louis: What were you going to tell me?
Beatrice: About her wonderful idea, Louis.
Blair: I have so many.
Dan: Blair, this isn't a joke. We are not leaving this room until you agree to get help.
Blair: I don't need help. I'm not bulimic. I'm pregnant.