Dan Humphrey Quotes
Dan: What are you doing here, deep in NYU territory? If you've developed a passion for Ukrainian food then I think we did spend too much time together.
Blair: Actually. I'm on a date. You can handle that, right?
Dan: We're just friends. Date away.
Rufus: Speaking of fights, where do things stand with you and Vanessa? Have you guys talked?
Dan: Yes. Only to reiterate the fact that we have nothing to talk about.
Rufus: You know I was angry with Vanessa too. But you guys have been friends your whole lives. That's not something you give up without some thought.
Rufus: Thanks for the movies. You want to come over later and join us for some screenings?
Dan: Um... you know what, I might have a thing.
Rufus: A thing? That's intriguingly vague. Another development in the complicated non-friends hang out situation?
Dan: No, that situation has figured itself out. It's official. We're, ah, we're just friends.
Blair: They moved the party.
Dan: Who moves a party?
Vanessa, I know we've been friends since we were little and we both like pirogies, and my dad really misses you, but just to be clear, so there's no misunderstanding down the road, we are not friends anymore.
Dan: Blair, your prince is out there waiting for you. Might not be me or Chuck, but he's out there.
Blair: Your princess is too. If you're ready for her.
Dan: I just wanted to make sure you knew that kiss meant nothing to me.
Blair: Oh. Right.
Dan: Social experiment gone wrong.
Blair: A princess kissing a labrador.
Dan: I appreciate you not calling me a toad.
Blair: I had no idea.
Dan: No, I know.
Blair: Nice suit though.
Blair [to Chuck]: Because it made me realize I wanted to be with you. Dan and I both know it meant nothing—less than nothing. Right?
Dan: Yeah, that's right.
Blair: I was going to tell you all about it tonight. But that would have been a huge mistake. Dan Humphrey may not be royalty but at least he's not a child.
Dan: So get this, I got a call that I'm being included in the modern royalty book.
Eric: Hm. No offense, but why?
Dan: Oh, none taken. 'Cause that was my first thought also. I guess there's some coup d'etat section for up-and-comers.
Eric: Oh yeah, that sounds totally made up.
Chuck: Did you notice her talking to anyone? Whoever she kissed seems to have had an effect. "Life-changing" were the words she used.
Dan: Well a life-changing kiss might not be something you want to mess with.
Chuck: What are you trying to say, Humphrey?
Dan: With you, she was always caught up in schemes and takedowns. But that's not really her. She's intelligent, she's intuitive. You know? She weeps when she watches Nights of Cabiria.
Chuck: How do you know that?
Dan: Uh... Serena told me. But listen, if Blair's happy, I mean maybe you should let her be.
Chuck: You care more about Blair's happiness than I knew.
Dan: Eh.
Chuck: Thank you for your time.
Dan: Hey Chuck. Uh, what are you doing here?
Chuck: May I come in?
Dan: Yeah.
Chuck: I've learned some information about my past that's making me reconsider my future. My future with Blair. However my intel indicates that she's seeing someone else.
Dan: What's that got to do with me?
