Popular Jim Halpert Quotes
Jim: So where are you shipping your foot?
Michael: Ha ha ha. So where are you shipping...
Dwight: YOUR foot?
Michael: Dwight, what's your middle name?
Dwight: Danger.
Michael: Something with a 'K'.
Jim: It's Kurt. Wow, I'm so sad I know that.
Michael: What do I write under "reason for visit?"
Jim: Concussion. Why, what'd you write?
Michael: ..."Bringing someone to the hospital."
Jim: Oh, you thought they meant YOUR reason for visit.
Michael: No, you know what? This isn't about me anymore.
Dwight: Where are we going?
Jim: Chuck E. Cheese.
Michael: Chuck E. Cheese? Oh, I'm so sick of Chuck E. Cheese.
Jim: We're going to the hospital, Michael.
Michael: I know, I'm just saying.
Michael: I wanted all of you to take a look at a few of the many, many disabled icons who have contributed so much to our society.
Jim: Quick question, uhh, why is Tom Hanks on the wall?
Ryan: Twice?
Michael: Good question. Forrest Gump — mentally challenged, Philadelphia — AIDS.
Kevin: I think that's from Big.
Michael: I don't think so, no.
Kelly: Yeah, he's dancing on a piano with Robert Loggia.
Michael: He grew into a man overnight. Rare disability. It still works.
Dwight: Chu chu chu chu...
Jim: What are you doing?
Dwight: Vietnam sounds.
I wanna clamp Michael's face in a George Foreman grill.
Jim
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Jim: [on his cell phone] Dunder Mifflin, this is Jim!
Jim: Um, is it me or does it smell like updog in here?
Michael: What's updog?
Jim: Nothing much, what's up with you?
Michael: What do you like best about Pam?
Jim: Oh, I really don't wanna talk about it.
Michael: What is it, is it her legs, her boobs, or?
Jim: Um, she's easy to talk to, I guess. And, she's got a really good sense of humor.
Michael: Really?
Jim: Mmm hmm.
Michael: Never gets any of my jokes.
Pam: Did you find anything good in your desk?
Jim: Uh... a coupon for a free sandwich.
Pam: Score.
Jim: It expired in August. And, my cell phone charger from two years ago.
Pam: Big day.
Jim: Big day.
My job is to speak to clients, um, on the phone about, uh, quantities and, uh, type of copier paper. You know, uh, whether we can supply it to them, whether they can, uh, pay for it. And, um... I'm boring myself just talking about this.
