Larry David Quotes
(reading from condolence book) "Beautiful service. Sorry about your loss. Where's Larry?"
My mother had a tattoo on her ass?
Andy: You missed a good one. This was a really nice...
Larry: I'm sorry I missed it. Perhaps had I been notified, I may have been able to attend my mother's funeral.
Larry: I changed my mind. I'd like to get it back.
Richard Lewis: You can't be an East Indian-giver.
Stu: Have a bite with the Reisers.
Larry: At least they pick up a check every now and then!
When you said "Mr. Duplicity" I naturally thought you were referring to me.
Cheryl: I'm acting like I'm not thrilled to be sitting here with you, but I am just out of my mind right now.
Larry: I've been urinating all day.
Alanis: Really? That's the effect I often have on people.
Larry: Did you tell him it was me?
Martine: No, I don't "dime."
Larry: Going to his pool party?
Jeff: Yeah I am. Yeah I am.
Larry: Wearing a bathing suit? Going swimming?
Jeff: Speedo!
Larry: (noticing a child's enormous penis) What's going on with this kid?
Susie: Ahhh!
Jeff: Wow!
Cheryl: Honestly, it's huge.
Hugh: Fuck you!
Larry: Fuck Hugh!
I think I'll go get myself a heterosexual single woman to play golf with.
