Gibbs: Tobias? What the hell’s going on?
Fornell: What’s going on? You got me fired!

The more you know, the less you understand.

Gibbs [on being told about memes]

Reeves: What a load of bollocks.
Doctor Cho [confused]: What?
Gibbs: Cut the crap, Doc.

Hug on your own time!

Ziva: Okay, so how many amendments to the Constitution?
Gibbs: The Bill of Rights is the first 10, prohibition is 18. I'm guessing 23.
Ziva: Twenty-seven!
Gibbs: Nobody likes a smart ass, David.

Rule #27: Two ways to follow: First way, they never notice you, Second way, they only notice you. (Season 7, Episode 15)

Tony: Thinking about visiting my ancestral home, England.
Gibbs: Why the sudden interest, DiNozzo?
Tony: I've been thinking about family a lot. I mean all I have is Senior, really. He's not getting any younger. I don't have anyone else. The way things are going I don't see kids in my future. So, I don't know. Guess I'm searching for a sense of belonging.

Meyer: I'm sorry, I feel like we're not on the same page. What's this about?
Gibbs: Joe Willis - he's your security officer?
Meyer: He in some kind of trouble?
Gibbs: Yeah, you could say that.
Meyer: Holy crap.
Borin: We on the same page now?

Tony: Don't believe the word he says. We've got motive, we've got opportunity.
Gibbs: Ahah.
Tony: I know. Why'd he come back?
Gibbs: It's a good question... Boss.
Tony: Boss?!
Gibbs: Was your case, wasn't it?
Tony: Yeah. You're not going back to Mexico, are you?
Gibbs: Your case, your lead.
Tony:(smiles) Really?
Gibbs: Yeah. I think it's even a rule.

Gibbs: What've you got?
Abby: A better question is what have you not got Abbs, and the better answer would be a Caf-Pow! I'm trying to make my own here, but I'm missing like 400 ingredients.
Gibbs: Are you all right?

Cabot: As you know, the Navy is trying harder than ever to eradicate sexual assault in their ranks.
Gibbs: Was Ensign Tate a rape suspect?
Cabot: Right to the point, as always. No Gibbs, Tate was a second-party complainant. He reported an assault on behalf of a friend.

Butt out McGee. Butt off my desk, Borin.

NCIS Quotes

Gibbs: Tobias? What the hell’s going on?
Fornell: What’s going on? You got me fired!

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott