Lily van der Woodsen Quotes
Dan: Hey, Mrs. van der Woods... Lily, hi!
Lily: Dan. Jenny.
Jenny: Hi!
Lily: Tree!
Dan: Yeah, um, they don't allow Christmas trees inside... which is why we're out here.
Jenny: Which is why Dan wants to ask from you a favor.
Lily: Let me guess. Does it involve distracting Dexter while you sneak that into the elevator?
Dan: Why, would that work?
Lily: No. Never. He has the eyes of a hawk and he takes his job very seriously.
Dan: So, I've noticed.
Lily: But Bobby at the service entrance, I think could be bought. Come.
Alison: I think we're splitting hairs here, Rufus. An emotional affair is just as bad as a physical one.
Lily: Oh, please. Nobody's buying that. Emotional affairs are necessary to keep a marriage alive.
Alison: And how many times have you been divorced?
Rufus: Alison, this is not about Lily. It's about you and me.
Alison: Exactly! And if we're going to have any chance, then she can't be here.
Rufus: So, you're not overreacting per se. You're just having a reaction that is so above and beyond what is appropriate.
Alison: I have been killing myself, trying to make up for what happened in Hudson.
Rufus: Which is not an overreaction, I might add.
Alison: And then I find out that the two of you are making out at a party.
Lily: Uh, it was hardly making out. And there's an explanation.
Serena: No, my mom is sick because she doesn't want to be imposing.
Lily: You know what? I'm fine just curling up and reading a good book.
Eric: You're supposed to be with your family on Thanksgiving.
Dan: And Nicholas Sparks is hardly family. I'm not taking no for an answer. In fact, I'm not even asking. You're coming with us. I'm adult-napping you.
Lily: Fine, just, stop talking. And I'll get ready.
Dan: Make it snappy, I'm double parked. Thanks!
Lily: These smell great.
Eric: Yes, so we can starve in a fragrant hotel room.
Serena: We're not starving. Look, I got us into this mess and I'm gonna get us out of it.
Lily: Elaborate, Serena.
Serena: Thanksgiving at the Humphreys. Dan invited me and Eric's friends with his sister and his dad's really cool.
Eric: Awesome, I'm leaving the pumpkin.
Serena: What do you say, mom?
Lily: There's nothing wrong with having Chinese food on Thanksgiving.
Serena: What?!
Lily: Jews have been doing it on Christmas since forever. Look, a pumpkin! It's festive, yes?
Serena: We're gonna eat a pumpkin?
Rufus: Since when were you the patron saint of former rock stars?
Lily: Since when were you a rock star?
Eric: Hey Mom. I'm sorry about tonight.
Lily: Oh, we'll talk about it in the morning. After you had a good night sleep in your own bed.
Eric: I'm going home?
Lily: I'm not sure exactly how this is gonna work, you know.
Eric: I'm not worried. (smiles) It's a good thing I didn't unpack.
Rufus: (answering the phone) This better not be my wife.
Lillian: Rufus! You always answer the phone like that?!
I figured social climbing would be more fulfilling.
It makes jokes. Cute.
Rufus: So, what did you think about it?
Lillian: I thought. (Pause) It was extraordinary
