We make a good team.

Claire

I can't go to jail. I'm a gay prosecutor, there's no prison gangs for that!

Haley: Thanks for putting in a good word for us.
Mitch: They just needed some reassurance, considering most of Dylan's money is tied up in Dave and Busters' gift cards.

Cam: Mitchell? Judge... Judy!
Mitchell: Your talent. It's like you were touched by a Gayngel.

You got rid of Henifer!

Phil: On the trip's final morning, Dede was found in her room. She had apparently passed peacefully in her sleep, as a smile graced her face and her hands clutched ten pages of suggestions for the hotel staff.
Claire: That is so mom.
Mitch: Easy.

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I know you're scared, but you should feel proud. You took kind of a weird kid and turned him into somebody so comfortable with himself, he's willing to take on a pretty big adventure.

Cam

Margaret is very vulnerable! I've had to rescue her a bunch of times from cults and an Amway pyramid.

Jay

Hey, you're blocking the driveway. Hit the road already.

Haley

That's why we chose our secret warrior signal. My first suggestion was to blow a Viking horn. Don't google that, by the way.

Phil

Mitch: It is a lot less money though.
Cam: Well, you know, we don't have to decide today.

You'll get a donut when I get answers, you piece of trash.

Cam

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley