Mitch: It is a lot less money though.
Cam: Well, you know, we don't have to decide today.

You'll get a donut when I get answers, you piece of trash.

Cam

The only time I break a sweat is when we run after the ice cream truck

Phil

You blew it you dummy. I wanted to sell the stupid sauce.

Gloria

Lilly: Are you gonna be this cool when I like a boy?
Mitch: No
Cam: No, not a chance.

How many Mannys do you see through these things?

Alex

Oops, I dropped the, uh, I wanna say egg chute, but I know it's probably something more Latin-y.

Why would you do that? My ears are still developing!

Joe

This is house Dunphy. We fail here.

Phil

You're one fire I can't put out. Also, grease is pretty tricky.

Bill

That's gonna be tough, I can smell Cinnabon.

Jay

You sound like Austin Powers, man.

Bill

Modern Family Quotes

Cam [giving Lily dating advice]: Definitely compliment his outfit, laugh at his jokes...
Lily: What if they aren't funny?
Cam: Oh honey, the cute ones rarely are. God doesn't give with both hands.

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay