Favorite Ned Quotes
Ned: Care to dance?
Chuck: Yes, please.
Can we not say kill? I touch them again and they return to how they were meant to be.
Ned: But do you hate me?
Chuck: I have to hate you a little, just for a little while. But I can’t do that if you stay
Ned: I don’t want you to hate me, I’ll stay.
Chuck: If you stay, I’ll just end up hating you more. Just go.
Ned: Do you know you have a "tell" when you lie?
Olive: Do I?
Ned: You answer questions with questions.
Olive: Maybe I know I have a tell and I know you know I have a tell and maybe I'm doing it now to confuse you because you don't know what tell I'm telling.
I could have been swarmed in my underwear.
Chuck: What if he was made entirely out of bees and that's why she couldn't see his face, because he didn't even have one? What if there's a whole beefolk society who walk around shaped like people?
Ned: You're thinking about how you can train your bees to walk around in people shapes, aren't you?
Chuck: Yeah.
What if someone from Betty's Bees finds out you're a spy?. Spying is a lot like sabotage in that they kill you for it. That's what you do with spies and saboteurs-you kill them. And you don't feel bad, because they're spying and sabotaging
Chuck: I'm not who you think I am.
Emerson: Who does he think you are?
Chuck: The small town girl who never saw the world who would have the first time out be her last... well, that iswho I am but... I was hoisted by my own pitard.
Ned: What's a pitard?
Chuck: In my case, the pitard was that Tahitian getaway. It was a devil's bargain.
Emerson: Who's the devil?
Chuck: Deedee Duffield, manager of Boutique Travel Travel Boutique. She offered me a high seas adventure at no cost. All I had to do was pick up a package.
Ned: Are you a drug mule?
Chuck: No, I'm a... monkey mule.
Chuck: I was having conversations with myself.
Ned: What did you guys talk about?
Chuck: There was a young man named Von Deenis...
Ned: Who they said had a very big...
Chuck: If Mother Superior found Larue's shiny stash...
Ned: Then all it would take was one push, and the convent would be back... in black.
Chuck: By-proxy high-five.
Emerson: Get, before I by-proxy vomit.
(after re-killing Sister Larue) We are so going to hell.